Jen16226

So I did my workout yesterday…..kids walking around and everything….but I did it.  I jumped right into The Firm’s rotation calendar.  I love The Firm workouts…when I lost my weight in 2003, I used it and have over 30 of their videos and you truly do get results.  You make it as difficult as you like.  I have a membership to their firm believers club and every month they have different rotation calendars, so I printed off May and June.  Since I have been slacking, I am starting with the intermediate one.  Once I get back into a groove, I will up it to advanced….hopefully in a couple of weeks. 

So the plan for today is oatmeal for breakfast, salad for lunch, fruit for snacks, not sure on dinner just yet.  We have 2 ballgames tonight…luckily both at home.  I am off on the exercise today.  I won’t even attempt to do anything either since for the next 3 days after I have workouts on the calendar.

Don’t get me wrong…..I love my fiance more than life itself and totally missed him while he was on the road all spring, but man when he comes home he screws me up completely!  Its been almost 2 weeks that he is home and I just can’t get back into a routine to save my life.  My routine was alway this:  Get home from work, change into workout clothes, get the kids off the bus, get them a snack and settle them to do homework, workout while they are doing their thing, cook dinner, hang out or go to childs ballgame.  With him home, he just throws a monkey wrench into it.  Yes part of it is that I don’t get to spend time with him but for maybe 10 days from January to May and I have missed him…..but the other part is just shear laziness.  I have got to get my butt in gear again. 

I already told him this morning that as soon as I get through the door I am working out so he needs to take the kids outside and play for an hour or whatever, but I need that time for me plain and simple and that if he does not see me working out that he has to yell at me. 

Food and water have been very good so far this week.  I went over in my calories yesterday though by 20. LOL  Considering I had a piece of leftover birthday cake at home that was good.  AND my biggest bravo of the day was we had a retirement party at work for one of the men I work with and they had this HUGE cake there and I did not have a piece knowing that I wanted a piece of cake at home.  I told myself I was not having 2 pieces of cake, only one so which one would it be.  HOORAY ME!

Well I am glad that the weekend is over so I can get back to semi normal with a semi routine. 

I had such a nice weekend though.  Nice and lazy for the most part, but we did things at least.

Yesterday was such fun.  Once we got all the kids from their other parents, we played in the backyard all afternoon….badminton and bocci.  What fun we had.

So on tap for today is work (Kevin being home now is nice so I can work 7-3) then Jess has 2 Dr. appts.

I can’t believe it’s the end of the weekend already!  It has been so nice and it has been so long since Kevin and I were able to just chill out for more than a day without kids or running somewhere.  Back to reality today as all 5 kids will descend on the house this afternoon! LOL

So food has been alright this weekend….it was the adult beverages that killed me on Saturday night! LOL  I put myself back into check yesterday and had a really good day.  I plan on doing the same today.

Today is also my honey’s birthday!  I am baking a cake for him here in a few mins since this morning will be my only free time.  Can you believe we even have a baseball game this evening!?!?  UGH.  What I might try to do is when everyone is up at the field, go for a quick skate on the trail and meet them all up there.  Our trail is 1.3 miles one way(if I remember correctly from last year when I measured it).

Food today should be alright….we are doing typical BBQ fare, but I am thinking I might throw a veggie burger on for myself.

AND I will keep downing the water!

Everyone have a great day.

Oh yes…..it is Friday and a 3 day, child free weekend to boot!!! WOO HOO.  No work, no ball games…..HOORAY!

This is going to be TMI but I have definately noticed something since getting my tubes tied over the winter….1st that I get my symptoms of TOM an entire week early now and 2 once here I feel like a train ran me over.  I can deal with this much better than the migraines the IUD was causing though, but still.  So my WI this week was up 2 pounds.  That is not surprising on a few different fronts….my food has not been spectacular, my exercise was nil, and well TOM.  I am VERY happy that a few of my friends that were on another weight loss support board have come over here with me.  We are going to do a challenge among ourselves.  I think this is just what I need to help me and for us to help each other.  I was on another challenge on here(and sorry if any of you are reading this) and I just think it wasnt for me.  I need something a bit smaller, so as not to get lost in the crowd and to get more motivation.

So on the food front today…..not sure because I honestly feel sick to my stomach. 

Yesterday was hectic and today is going to be even worse!  Between work being swamped all this week and baseball/Tball/softball games….I am going nuts!  Last night Jess had an away game, they won, but I had no clue where this place was…so that was fun.  The good part was there was nothing that would trigger me at that concession stand! LOL  Tonight all 4 kids are playing at 3 different fields.  At least the boys are at the same field…my future inlaws are taking them there because both girls are away tonight at 2 different fields…the field I am going to is almost an hour away in the middle of Amish country. 

I have been keeping my hands busy so I can’t eat when tempted with the afghan.  I am almost done!  I have been bringing it to the ballgames and doing it at home.  You can’t eat holding yarn and a hook!

My food was good yesterday eating in the 1400’s.  Apparently with the running, I didn’t get any exercise in and I won’t tonight either.  HOWEVER……we will not have any kids this weekend!  NONE!  We have no idea what to do with ourselves…this is a first where we do not have any for 3 days.  I do know that Friday night through Monday, weather permitting, I will go for either a skate or a walk on the trail.  It is 1.3 miles one way….very small trail compared to down by my old house, but I will do it a few times to get the mileage there.  I do not street skate…not brave enough! LOL

So for today…..breakfast will be oatmeal, lunch not sure yet…probably a salad…dinner I think is hot dogs.  I have fruit cocktail and pineapple waiting for fruit for a snack.

I am sure alot of you know this little trick…..if you eat more points than you should or more calories than you should..and you are journaling, you comveniently leave out anything that put you over the number you need and it doesn’t count! LOL  I have done that before.  Well last night even though I did not stay in my calorie range, I still journaled it anyway.

I am really trying hard to get back on track here….the past 2 weeks have just been very hard…too much drama.  I have brought a couple of new people on here with me from another board and they know me….there is ALWAYS drama…but the past couple of weeks have really been horrible.  I am really proud of my self though..truly I am.  A few years ago, I was going through a TON of things at once and that is when I said screw it, and a year later gained all my weight back.  At least this time I am fighting while dealing with issues.  Every day may not be a perfect day with food and exercise (which has been nil lately…someone join my exercise challenge with me to kick my butt into gear please) but this time I am at least fighting.

Yesterday was a good food day for me….definately.  I kept it at 1300 calories and got all the water in.  I did not workout though like I wanted.  I had sooo much running to do last night…..Blair had a game at 5:30, Garrett at 6:00, Jess practice at another field at 6:00, Dev game at 7:30.  The little one did AWESOME at his little TBall game….he hit the ball out to the fence last night!!!  I was sooooo excited!  Dev and his friend were working with him on batting over the weekend and I guess that helped. LOL  It helps to have older ones that play too!

So not alot of drama yesterday…..I did go to the courthouse and file for a hearing to get an increase in my child support.  That will get his attention…but probably not in a good way, which is why I also called the best child support/divorce lawyer in my county.  I have an appointment with her in 3 weeks.  I know as soon as we have that hearing and I don’t bow down to him and actually get what I need for once instead of feeling sorry for him, that he will take me to court for custody.  At this point, I am so mad about the whole thing, I truly don’t care.  How dare he put stuff into her head. UGH

Alright plan for today…..eat good again!  Drink my water! And I do not have any running tonight so I was planning to go to my old spinning class, but think I will opt instead to go downstairs and do the elliptical while I am doing laundry.  I haven’t done it in so long I will probably die on it!

the drama department kicks back in!  UGH!  I feel like all I do is vent on here about “stuff”.  Yeah in a way it is weight loss related….I am one of those people that if the wind is taken out of my sails for something, it takes a bit for me to get back to it…..like exercise.

So last night, Jess starts in again….I tell her that she needs to take a bath once Garrett is done.  1/2 hour goes by and I tell her she needs to go up…she is watching something and starts crying and “but I want to watch this”  I tell her that she needs to go run her water and there will be reruns…she starts crying but not moving off the couch….I tell her again she needs to go take her bath and I shut the TV off and tell her if she continues she will get 2 days no TV….she continued with her fit and again was asking for the TV so I told her thats it, no TV for 2 days.  When she gets upset and frustrated she does not know how to shut it down.  So she takes her bath….still crying….she comes down and asks again about the TV…now during this, Kevin is on the phone with me hearing it all and can’t believe it….she I told her that her doing that is not respectful of me (at this point she said a few things) and does she treat her dad like this at his house and told her that during the time she has no TV that she needs to think about the way she talks to me and others around her.  So she comes down about 20 minutes later telling me she has something on her mind….long story(as if not long enough) short…that her Dad and his wife told her that when the time comes for her to choose where she wants to live if she doesn’t choose them they will be very upset with her!!!!  WTF!!!!!!!!!!!!!  I think THIS explains some things about her behavior.  I have been MORE than fair with my ex….even when he was not a part of her life before he met his current wife….suddenly he became father of the year….but I have never said anything bad about him to Jess and kept the adult issues away from kids.  This however, made me spout off at the mouth a bit last night and I told her some truths about why we split up(not in full detail) and different things of his nature.  Also, in talking to Kevin about all of it last night, I am calling a lawyer today and domestic relations….I am moving my child support case to my county and I am going to refile to get the minimum I can get….thats right minimum because in with my being a nice person and feeling badly for him, I take only 1/4 of what I am entitled to…..being nice apparently has not gotten me anywhere and him putting that type of guilt on my 9 y/o’s head has just pushed me from being nice into another mode that he is not going to like very much.

So onto today…..I have no idea what I am eating yet….I don’t think my stomach can take food I am so upset……I will be doing Sculpted Buns hips & Thighs for my workout later.  After that it’s up to the ballfield…3 games and 1 practice. UGH.

What a past few days I have had!  Thursday and Friday I was sick with whatever stomach bug has been going around.  So Friday I went into work for a couple of hours and came home…well Kevin was home and said let’s go get some of the wedding stuff done…..like I really felt up to it.  So off we go to get our marriage license and then down to the mall to get our wedding rings (which got me really mad because the girl at the jeweler never ordered my ring in from a month ago and wouldn’t you know it is discontinued!!!!  Luckily they found one at another store) and I bought my dress….nothing fancy just a simple dress….HOWEVER…I bought it a size smaller than I thought I would need…a 9/10…..I came home and tried it on (no I hate trying stuff on at stores) thinking “OK how much working out do I need to do to get into it?” well low and behold it fits PERFECTLY!!!  Actually it is a little loose in the waist, but thats OK. 

So I hadn’t really eaten in a few days because my stomach was just upset….well unfortunately, I made up for it last night when I was feeling better.  A bunch of us neighbors got together last night across the street and this guy is like my dad….loves to cook different things and feed the masses.  I think I picked pretty well considering what was there….my fave was the turkey burgers that had turkey bacon mixed in! YUMMY!

Anyway…on tap for today is the store on the hunt for lattice and then drop my stepdaughter off at her house and home to straighten up before the minister that is marrying us comes over at 4.